Monthly Archive for June, 2008

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The Secret to Sharing

Wednesday, we had a couple of friends over to play. We met them through the local Moms’ Club, and Claire and Heath really hit it off, and I really enjoy chatting with his mom. We’ve done a lot of activities with them, and we’ve had some one-on-one playdates as well.

One of the reasons I joined the Moms’ Club was so that Claire would have a chance to learn how to share her toys. Learning to share is a big step in the socialization process. When Claire was younger, she would “share” willingly with others. She’d go so far as to force her toys on others. “Here,” she’d say. “Take my Puppy.” Everyone would say, “Oh, what a wonderful sharer!” But, I knew the truth. She didn’t really have a concept of “mine” and “yours” so she wasn’t really sharing. All of this nicety and getting-along-ness was purely coincidental.

Cue the 24-month mark, and all of a sudden, the concept became clearer. This is mine. This is NOT yours. You can NOT have this. This is mine. But, I want that! I don’t care if it’s yours. I want that! The world is ending! Terrible, disastrous things are happening to me and all of my precious treasures!

*sigh*

All of a sudden, she couldn’t see past the minute at hand. She couldn’t see sharing as a temporary thing. It was as if she feared that she was signing over the ownership of said item, never to see it again…sharing being this legally binding contract that rips your toys out of your possession.

Overall, she was doing a pretty good job of sharing, but toward the end of the playdates, her patience would wear thin, and she would convince herself that everyone was out to steal her things forever. On purpose.

So, we’ve been practicing. We have all kinds of playdates with all kinds of people in all kinds of places. We share left and right, up and down, and sideways. The other moms and I referee the trading and force the taking of turns. Slowly, she and her friends are getting it.

And, Wednesday, before Heath got to our place, I let her in on a little secret. “You know,” I said to Claire, looking her straight in the eyes. “Heath is going to come over here and you guys are going to have so much fun playing…and, he’s going to touch all of your toys. He’s going to play with all of your animals and all of your things. And, you’re going to let him, because you’re a good friend.”

“He’s going to play with all of my toys?” Claire asks, uncertainty in her voice. “Even my kitty? Even my oven? Even my dolly stroller? Even my sandbox?”

“Yes, but that’s okay…because you’re a good friend, and good friends share their toys.”

“Okay,” she said, telling me what I wanted to hear, but not at all sure about this proposition.

“Plus, you wanna know a secret?” I asked her.

“Yes!” she said, very excited about secrets.

“Just remember…it’s okay to let Heath play with all your toys, because when he leaves?” I said, putting a question in my voice for effect. “They’ll still be here. And, they’ll be all yours again. You’ll get to have them all to yourself.”

“Oh!” she said. “When he leaves, I still get to have all my toys?” she asked. “All to myself?” I could tell that she’d never even considered this fact.

And, it was if the light bulb went off in her head. It was as if she finally realized that sharing isn’t a permanent thing. Or a bad thing. Or a weak thing. It’s a fun thing to do. It doesn’t change anything, except make the playdate that much more exciting.

And you know what? She did really well with sharing with Heath! We had a couple of rough spots, but they were quickly smoothed over when I reminded her about the secret I’d shared with her earlier.

And, I dare say, she finally saw a glimpse of the real secret to sharing: it really can be a lot of fun…and the more you practice, the more fun you have.

The ups and downs (literally) of a fun-filled Friday

Technically, I’m writing this after midnight, so it’s Saturday now. It’s amazing how quickly the day flies. Thankfully, I was able to end this Friday while watching movies with the hubby, all of the excitement of the day behind me.

Needless to say, this Friday started out as a lovely day and then took some interesting turns before ending on a pleasant note.

In the morning, Claire and I met some mom’s group people at the park here by the lake. Claire has discovered a newfound skill in climbing up all the ladders and chain-linky things on the playground equipment. She’s quite good at it…and amazingly so…and much to my dismay. ;)

She’s got mad skillz, yo!

But I am right there, making sure she doesn’t fall. Rather than tell her not to do it, I try to teach her how to do it the safest way. Far be it from me to hold her back. Can one stop the earth from turning? Can one hold back the tides? I didn’t think so.

Plus, I guess if I’m going to threaten to sell her to the circus, it’s best to get her skills in order. ;)

We played for a couple of hours and then she told me she needed to pee (yea!!), so we go to the porta-potties, which are disgusting (boo!). “It is GROSS!” Claire says, and it is. Even I wouldn’t pee in there. The poor thing refuses to go, and I don’t blame her. I tried to get her to pee behind a tree (shhh, don’t tell…I was desperate!), and she refused. So, we decide to call it a day and head back home…I was just hoping she could hold it for the walk back.

We sit down at a picnic table to get our things in order, and somehow, she slips off the bench and smacks the back of her head on the cement. Honestly, I didn’t even see it happen. I heard it. :-( I had my head turned for one second and the next thing I know, she’s lying under the picnic table on her back.

Luckily, it was popsicle day for the mom’s club, and the other mom still there from our group had an icepack in her cooler. So, I sit there with the icepack on the big ol’ goose-egg on Claire’s head.

Note to self: Goose-egg = swelling on the outside of the brain = GOOD

All the while, Claire is apologizing for falling off the picnic table. She wasn’t horsing around, and she wasn’t goofing off. There was no need to apologize. Poor little thing.

And, during all this, she still hasn’t wet her pants!

After sitting a while with the icepack, we decide to go home. Somehow, she made it home and onto the potty in time! As I’m getting lunch ready, she goes to her room and falls asleep! Uh oh! I decided not to wake her up, but kept checking on her. Finally, I woke her up to eat. She ate, grudgingly.

Then, I go to my office to check my mail, and she comes in and says she wants to be picked up. She says her head hurts and she doesn’t feel good. I pick her up and she throws up all over. Lovely. So, I run her to the bathtub and call the pediatrician. Hmmm, let’s see. I’m not a professional, but a goose-egg on her head, not acting like herself, and then barfing all over? Not the best sign. I’m not sure how to proceed, so I called the experts.

They say that letting her sleep is okay as long as I check to make sure she doesn’t aspirate on barf.

They also give me the following tips for future reference:
The “Don’t let them go to sleep” Rule = OUT
The “Letting them sleep but watching them like a hawk” Rule = IN
Throwing up ONCE after hitting your head = OKAY
Throwing up more than once after hitting your head = BAD

Good to know…so I don’t feel so bad for letting her fall asleep while I was making lunch.

My hubby has been in a class for work all week, so I page him with this latest development. This way, he won’t be surprised if he gets another page telling him at which ER to meet us.

Luckily, after the Tylenol and a nap, she seemed to be just fine. In fact, by the time Daddy got home, Claire was showing me how high she can jump (awesome! …not) and singing Happy Birthday to all of her animals.

And, in case there is any confusion, yes, she climbs all over all kinds of things without so much as a wobble and then smacks her head falling off a picnic table bench.

Go figure.

Pay Attention!

So, I gave my hubby an intense talking-to about Claire and the potty. “She will tell you when she needs to pee,” I said. “And you HAVE to be listening. You HAVE to pay attention. At this early stage in the game, you may not have much time to get her to the potty, so when she says she has to go, she has to go…NOW. Not two minutes from now. Not when you’re done with whatever you’re doing. NOW. Got it?”

“Uh, yeah,” he said. This wasn’t the all-fired response I was looking for, but I’d take it. All of the criteria for this particular “I told you so” could be crossed off my To Do List for the day. ;)

Then, I turned to Claire. “Claire,” I said, holding on to her shoulders so she would listen to me. “When you have to pee or poop, you tell us immediately. Don’t wait. And, if Daddy isn’t paying attention, you tell him louder. Like this, ‘DADDY! I HAVE TO PEE!’ And, if he still isn’t paying attention, you shake his arm like this, and say, ‘DADDY! I HAVE TO PEE RIGHT NOW!’” I say, shaking her arm in mock urgency. “Understand?”

“Yep!” and away she went to play.

So, the other day, I’m sitting at the kitchen table, and Claire is playing in the living room. She’s going back and forth between the living room, dining room and kitchen, talking and jabbering like she always does. I’m reading my blogs on my GoogleReader.

I’ll admit it. I’ve toned her out. The precious thing talks nonstop all day. This is wonderful, and I’m so glad she’s so verbal, but I can’t help but tone her out at times. What can I say? I’m human.

All of a sudden, I feel someone shaking my arm. “MOMMA! I HAVE TO PEE RIGHT NOW!” she screams at me. I have no idea how long she’s been telling me she has to go, so I jump to action.

“AAAAAAAHHHH! OOOOHHH NOOOOO!” I yell as I’m running down the hallway. “LET’S GO! LET’S GO! LET’S GO! LET’S GO, CLAIRE!” I scream. “I’m SO SORRY I wasn’t paying attention!” And I couldn’t help but laugh at myself out loud.

She starts laughing too as we run to the bathroom, and thankfully, she makes it onto the potty in time.

“Claire, you were so good to get my attention! You did the right thing! I’m so SORRY I wasn’t paying attention!” I confessed. I felt horrible. Here I had given my hubby this big ol’ speech about paying attention, especially when the potty training is so important, and what did I do? I’d totally ignored my poor child.

And, when Daddy got home, I sheepishly told him what had happened, but I told him that Claire knows what to do…so be prepared for the arm-shaking…it happens to the best of us. ;)

So, I was hyper-vigilant the rest of the day and listened to everything that came out of her mouth. The next time she told me she had to go, I was right there, but that wasn’t good enough for her. “Scream!” she said with glee. So, I did. I screamed with the excitement like I had before. “Laugh!” she screeched. So, I did. “Run!” she screamed, as we ran down the hallway to the bathroom.

It will be tomorrow in 16 years…

Claire has been learning so many new things lately, that my head is spinning. I can only imagine how she is feeling with all these new skills swirling around in her head!

She’s potty-trained! She’s in her big girl bed! And, on Tuesday, she learned how to drink from a straw. I know this may sound like a silly milestone to some, but not for Claire and me.

I breastfed Claire for a year and used the month after her first birthday to wean her. During that year, she only drank from a bottle if I was going to be gone for the evening, and honestly, that wasn’t very often…everything else she got straight from the tap, so to speak. ;) (I hand-pumped milk for her cereal for 6-months, but that falls into the food category, not the beverage one.)

Then, I weaned her straight to a cup — a cup cup, not a sippy cup. We don’t even have any sippy cups in the house. Actually, that’s not true. I bought two little sippy cups because I was looking for little cups with lids, and they were the only kind I could find at the time. I took the valves out of them and only use the sippy lids as lids for the fridge.

Had I known at the time that we would soon have a horde of 47 small plastic children’s cups and lids collected from different restaurants, I wouldn’t have made those purchases, but they are nice cups.

Claire is an expert at drinking from a glass. She rarely spills and has mastered all sizes of glasses or cups. She can also drink from various water bottles, and is even an expert at screwing and unscrewing the lids. (Yes, this is good and bad…)

But, up until Tuesday, she thought a straw was a neat little toy….and she had no idea how to actually use one.

In the past, I’d tried to get her to do it, and it was a lost cause. I’d give up after a while, vowing to teach her when I had more patience.

But, on Tuesday, I thought that it was high time she learned, since she is 2.5 now. There are no excuses! If she can tackle how to use the potty, she can drink from a straw! Yes, I know they are in no way related… :) Plus, I was feeling overabundant in the patience department, and that rarely happens. Ya gotta take advantage of that while you can! ;)

First, I showed her how to blow bubbles with it (this may backfire in the long run, but she would have discovered it anyway) and then I showed her how to reverse the motion to suck the water up the straw. She figured it out in no time! We have an official straw drinker!

After she caught on so quickly, I was amazed. I looked at her and said, “Wow, Claire! I just can’t believe it. You’re such a big girl! You’re wearing big girl panties! You’re sleeping in a big girl bed! And, now you’re drinking with a straw! Soon, you’ll be driving and then you’ll go to college.”

“Oh, Momma…” she said with a serious look and a smile. “Maybe I’ll learn how to college tomorrow.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. First, she’d used the phrase “to college” as a verb, and I thought about how true that actually is…. And, the fact that she felt like she’d learned enough for one day made me laugh as well.

And, then I realized how in a blink of an eye, sixteen years will fly by and it will be tomorrow, and she will be discovering how “to college” actually works.

So, for now, I’m relishing my little big-girl-panty-wearing, big-girl-bed-sleeping, straw drinker, and I’m wondering what she’ll learn next.

Key Lime Pie Recipe

I mentioned in the comment section of a previous post that I’d publish the Key Lime Pie Recipe I love to make. Well, here it is. I’d love to take credit for this, but I actually got it from Weight Watchers. It is the simplest recipe I’ve ever seen. The first time I made it, I was just sure I missed a step, because could it really be this easy? It is. There isn’t anything “real” in this recipe, so the pieces are only 3-points a piece.

I used to make it all the time, and we eventually got burned out on it. So, I stopped making it. When Claire and I were in the store gathering ingredients for the meal I was going to make my hubby for Father’s Day, I tried to find a ready-made Key Lime Pie, because it’s one of his favorite desserts. I couldn’t find one! Then it hit me…I used to make this! All the time! I got out my Palm Pilot, and sure enough, I still had the recipe with me. So, we gathered the ingredients and made it for him. He loved it!

Even he didn’t remember why I’d stopped making them. ;) So, we may have to make some more this summer.

Key Lime Pie

1 box (0.3 oz) sugar-free lime-flavor gelatin
1/4 cup boiling water
2 containers (6 oz each) key lime pie-flavor light yogurt
1 container (8 oz) frozen fat-free whipped topping, thawed
1 prepared 9″ reduced-fat graham cracker pie crust

In large heat resistant bowl, dissolve gelatin in boiling water. With wire whisk, stir in yogurt; with wooden spoon, fold in whipped topping.

Transfer mixture to prepared crust; refrigerate overnight. (Note: You don’t have to let it set overnight, but the longer it sets, the better.)

I’m not a foodie, nor am I good at taking photos of food or the steps it takes to make a recipe. (Cathy, from The Noble Pig, is…you should check out her blog sometime for some really cool recipes!) In fact, the only picture I was able to snap of this pie was when it was almost gone. Claire is finishing the last half of the last piece.

Click photo to enlarge.
Clicking a second time will show more detail.

Key Lime Pie

It’s a good thing this pie is so easy to make, because it certainly doesn’t last long. ;)

All By Myself

Well, with a title like that, you’d think I was talking about how Claire wants to do most things…but I’m not. Not this time. This time, I’m talking about something I did all by myself for the very first time.

I went to a movie by myself.

(There are no spoilers in this post.)

Granted, my husband and brother-in-law dropped me off at the theatre, so technically, I didn’t ‘go’ to the movie by myself, but I paid for the ticket, bought my little box of Junior Mints and my icy Diet Coke, went to the bathroom, waited in line and picked my seats…all by myself.

I was the first one into the theatre. I picked my favorite seat, near the top, dead center.

What did I see? And, why was I by myself?

Well, my hubby and I went to the new Indiana Jones movie before our trip to the Midwest. We knew that Granny & PaPa’s Babysitting Service would have a spot available for a certain toddler, so we decided to take advantage of that and see another movie with Uncle Wah, like we have practically every time we’ve visited with Claire in tow.

I wanted to see Sex and the City, but I knew that my brother-in-law wouldn’t want to. My hubby watched nearly every show with me (and enjoyed them, but I’m probably not supposed to admit that in a public forum, so just pretend I didn’t say anything), so I knew he’d go with me…but I knew if given a choice, he’d rather see an action movie with his brother.

So, I hatched a brilliant plan. Why don’t we all go to the movies, and I can watch what I want, and you can watch what you want! It’s a big place! There are different movies starting and stopping all within minutes of each other!

But, we’d already seen the new Indiana Jones movie, and he had various reasons for not wanting to see any of the other ones. My hubby said he would watch it again with him, but he had other ideas.

So, I told them to go. Go have fun and drop me off at the theatre. For real. I didn’t want to stand in their way of doing whatever it is that Uncle Wah wanted to do, and I wasn’t going home from our trip without having seen Sex and the City.

So, they did! And, we all had a great time. (And, they even remembered to come pick me up when it was over!)

I know the reviews have been mixed, but I loved this movie. It was exactly what I expected. Now, you have to realize, I am a diehard fan of the show. I don’t need things to be completely realistic as long as they stay true or add value to the characters, and they did.

I watched every single episode of that show from the day it started in 1998 to the day it ended in 2004. And considering I watched them all on Live TV, that’s dedication!! (I’d have to look back through our records to see when we actually got TiVO…and if we had it by the end, we hadn’t had it very long.)

I loved the series. I loved the characters. I can see a little bit of Carrie, Samantha, Miranda, and Charlotte in myself and my friends. (Some of us are more of one character than the others, but that could be another blog post in itself.) In a twisted sense, it was as if they were my real-life girlfriends. I laughed with them. I cried with them. I even got very angry with them. I will never forget when Carrie cheated on Aidan with Mr. Big. I was so mad I screamed at her through my television set, and I may or may not have cried, and I was mad all the next day. “How could she do that to Aidan!” I’d say with clenched teeth, shaking my fists in the air. My real friends and I talked about her and how devastating this would be to Aidan when he found out…because they always find out. (What she didn’t know is that Aidan will always be “Chris in the Morning” from Northern Exposure. And he had been my boyfriend for years…but I digress….) But, I forgave Carrie. It took a week or so (and obviously I’m still not truly over it), but I was able to move on.

In the end, I always supported her, because she was my friend. Real friends or not, we’d spent so many years together, that I tried to look past her indiscretions and see what was going to happen next.

And, speaking of endings, I loved the ending of the show. It left us in a relatively happy place and a place full of possibilities. When I first heard rumors of them doing a movie, I was excited and apprehensive. I didn’t want that ending to be ruined. And, after seeing the movie, I’m satisfied. I thought they did a good job, and I was thoroughly entertained.

I felt as though I was seeing some girlfriends that I hadn’t seen in a while. We were able to jump right in and catch right up. It was awesome. Every movie has its “I’m not sure I would have written it that way” parts, but overall, I loved it, and I’m so glad I saw it on the big screen.

And, I did it all by myself.
;)

Monday Random Thoughts

Here is a list of six random thoughts for a Monday morning, in no particular order:

  • We have a sump pump so that our basement won’t flood and create a huge mess. To check to see if the sump pump is working, it’s really hard not to make a huge mess. Granted, the mess isn’t as huge as it would be if the sump pump wasn’t working…so I do it, but only once a year.
  • Hearing my hubby involuntarily say, “Mmmmm!” while eating a recipe I threw together on a whim for him on Father’s Day is awesome. He loves Asian/Thai food, and I concocted a recipe involving scallops, shrimp, ginger, garlic, asparagus and coconut milk. I wasn’t using an official recipe, so I was hoping it would turn out well, and it did!
  • People often ask if I see the glass half empty or half full. Since having a toddler, my response is, “I don’t care, as long as you keep it away from the edge of the table.”
  • I could have sworn that Sleeping Beauty was a brunette…or at least had some form of darkish, brownish hair. She looks totally different now than I remember in my childhood memories. According to all the Disney Princess Paraphernalia strewn about my daughter’s room, she’s blond. Am I thinking of someone else? Has she always been a blonde? Would it be completely dorky for me to research this? And, does it really matter?
  • My heels were horribly dry and cracked this winter, and I thought it would go away this spring. It didn’t. I had a consultation with Dr. Google, and followed his (her?) advice. The cream I have now is like a miracle potion and my heels are nearly completely crack-free after just three days! The reviews of the product mentioned that it has a slight odor, but they weren’t specific and said it wasn’t a deal-breaker to using the cream. As soon as I opened the package, I was anxious to see what it smelled like. It’s the perfect mixture of Band-Aids® and Nursing Homes. They were right; it’s interesting and distinctive, but not a deal breaker.
  • Growing up, we used the word “tinkle” for the word “pee.” My hubby and I don’t use the word “tinkle” with Claire, and I don’t think she’s ever heard it. However, since some of Claire’s big girl panties have TinkerBell™ on them, and since my life has become consumed by the potty training process, I can’t help but call the little character on her panties Tinkle Bell in my head. I have to try really hard not to laugh out loud.

I’m beginning to think a little kid lives here

Well, Saturday was a big day here in our little world.

Saturday marked Day Number Three of Claire being in big girl panties…all day!

Over the last few months, potty training had been on hold per the pediatrician’s advice. We’d had a very common issue rear its ugly head, and that was putting a crimp in our plans. So, we stepped back and stopped the training (which really hadn’t been “training” in the first place. Claire had shown an interest, so we were casually following her lead.) Well, things were starting to run smoothly again, and she was still dry every time I’d get her in the morning or up from her nap (and she had been for months…that never changed). So, I had another chat with Dr. B. He said that it was fine to go ahead and go forward with the training. He said it would be difficult, but that it would be okay to challenge her.

So, go forward we did, and challenging it was.

Without getting into too much detail, it was a struggle…and “struggle” doesn’t quite describe it. It was the most challenging job I’ve tackled yet. She would fight me tooth and nail but then be so excited with the end result. That was frustrating, to say the least.

Then, when we went on our trip the first week in June, we took the potty with us. Claire used the potty every time I suggested it. Her diaper was dry 99% of the time. She not only used the potty at every location where we were staying, she used real toilets in restaurants and rest areas. And, she was doing everything in the potty. The special stuff we have her on is helping everything go smoothly (so to speak), and it’s been a blessing in disguise. I was amazed, and this was a clear sign that once we returned, we could bump the training up a notch.

I got some Training Panties from Target. I’ve always used Target Brand diapers, because they fit Claire well and they are cheap(er) compared to the name-brand. The Training Panties are like pull-ups in that they are disposable and you put them on like underwear. I got the kind that have little girls on the front.

Claire rarely had an accident in them…mostly because I was taking her to the potty throughout the day. I would also watch for intricate little details in her facial expressions or body language that may indicate that she had to go. She’d vehemently deny that she had to go, which was a sure sign that she needed to. I’d take her to the potty and she’d go. I’d do the happy dance. She was so proud of herself, and I was so proud of her!

Soon, she stopped refusing to go and would jump up and go with me willingly.

“I wanna pat-pat-pat, Momma!” she’d say proudly, when she was done. I’d grin the biggest grin and hand her the toilet paper.

So, a few days ago, she comes running to me, all upset. “Momma!” she screamed. “I accidentally peed on my girls!! But I stopped!! I need to go to the potty to finish!!”

So, we ran in there, and she finished what she needed to do in the potty. (She still needs me to assist her in getting up on the potty quickly. The potty we have can be used as a free-standing model or you can dismantle it and use the potty ring on the big toilet and flip the base over to use as a stepstool. This is the way I prefer, because of the clean-up factor. And, Claire likes it, too.)

This was a sure sign that she not only had enough control to stop what was happening, but she really understood when it was going to happen.

We went that afternoon to pick out her very own big girl panties. That afternoon, it was like something clicked in Claire’s head. All of a sudden she got it. She told me she had to go. We went, and she did! She’s been telling me ever since. It’s amazing.

So, for three days now, she’s either had Ariel The Mermaid™ or TinkerBell™ emblazoned on her buns. She told me that “Ariel will cry if I pee on her,” [her words, not mine. I swear!] so she does everything in her power to see that that doesn’t happen. Luckily, TinkerBell feels the same way. ;) And, Claire hasn’t had any accidents yet.

I know that accidents are bound to happen, but that’s all part of the learning process. And, even if they do happen, we’re done with diapers. We’re not looking back.

Yes, my job has gotten a little more stressful and a little more complicated, and I have to actually pay attention to everything she says now. ;) But the freedom I feel when I realize that we’re done with diapers is overwhelmingly refreshing.

And, in other news…

On Thursday, a friend mentioned to me that they hadn’t put their little girl in a big girl bed yet. (This girl is just two weeks older than Claire…they are both just 2 ½ years old.) I’d emailed her back about how we hadn’t put Claire into a big girl bed yet either. She still has plenty of room, and she hadn’t tried to escape, and I really liked having her caged. That sounds bad, but if you’ve ever had a toddler, you understand that sentiment. ;)

On Friday, Claire apparently read my email and decided to show me a thing or two. She tried THREE TIMES to climb into her crib. She didn’t let her lack of stature thwart her, because when she wasn’t able to scale the side without assistance, she was quick to find two different step stools to use. Granted, this is slightly better than figuring out how to climb out of your crib, but still…I nearly had a heart attack.

Click photo to enlarge.
Clicking a second time will show more detail.

Here is Claire, lounging on her “big girl bed”
Problem Solved

Saturday morning, Daddy and I dismantled the crib. We’d planned on just moving it to the basement for now and dismantling it later, but it wouldn’t fit through the doorway. So, apart it came. Claire is now sleeping on her “big girl bed” which consists of her crib mattress on the floor. Right now, it’s exactly where her crib was, so she doesn’t seem to be having any trouble adjusting to it. She loves it. In the future, we’ll get a real bed frame and a larger mattress, but we’ll see how this goes for a while.

We also removed the screen door. I’ve had a love-hate relationship with that door lately. I loved that I could have her room closed and open-and-airy at the same time. But, once she learned how to open it, it became this annoying finger pinching toy. We could latch it, but she’s so stubborn (I wonder where she gets this trait?) ;) that she would get it open, even if it meant ruining the screen in the process.

So, we took the door down on Saturday, too. We’re using a gate in her doorway at night and will give her more and more freedom as time goes on…or not. :)

With all the changes around here, I hardly recognize the place. No diapers, no crib, no screen door. I’m beginning to think that a little kid lives here and not a baby girl.

I wonder how that happened. :)

Behold the power of chicken

While on our Tour of the Midwestern Trifecta: Spring 2008 Version, we went to a family reunion. This reunion was for my husband’s side of the family, specifically his paternal grandmother’s side. If I’m not mistaken, when Ma and Pa came over from Denmark, they homesteaded in the area and had seven children. One of those sons was Claire’s Great-Grandma’s father.

When we arrived, we were requested to wear name tags, and the hosts this year decided to color-code things. Each of the siblings were designated a color, and if you were a descendant of that sibling, you wrote your name in that color. It was a really cool idea, and was really neat to look around the room and see the different family lines being represented.

Maybe they’ve done this the years past? We don’t know. The last time my hubby went was 15 years ago (or so), and I’ve never been, and we’ve been together for over 11 years. We live a couple states away, so it’s hard to make a special trip just for this. But this year, our trip to the Midwest was going to coincide with the reunion, so we went.

I wasn’t sure what to expect, but having been fully immersed in my Travel Zen Mentality, I knew we would have a good time. And, we did! I met some really cool people!

The one challenging part was the fact that my normally outgoing and spirited little girl was at the end of her very long rope. She’d spent almost a week of being trapped in a car seat for hours and hours and being completely overwhelmed by tons of people she barely remembered. And, if she did remember them, that was fine, but why is everyone touching me? Is there no such thing as personal space? Nope. Sorry. You’re cute. You’re two, and no one gets to see you often. That’s what happens.

So, we walk into the venue, and Claire clings to me. She begs to be picked up. She snuggles her face into my neck, sucking her thumb and holding Puppy tightly with the same hand while slowly twisting her hair with her other hand. All of these are sure signs that she’s reached her limit.

Unlike what usually happens, she didn’t unclench after a few minutes. She still clung to me and was very whiny. This is something I’ve been seeing more of since she turned the Proverbial Two, but still…she normally warms up pretty quickly. The time zones are off, and we’ve been eating at various times, and the thought crossed my mind that she could be hungry.

I asked her if she was hungry, and of course, she said she wanted milk. I didn’t think to bring any. And, there wasn’t any provided. Water would have to do, but she wanted nothing to do with it. We’re trying to get our covered dishes organized (it was a pot luck) and our places set, and of course, we’re being bombarded by people we haven’t seen in forever, if ever at all. It was all very exciting and overwhelming.

She almost suffered a complete meltdown. As soon as introductions were made, and we were free to fill our plates, Daddy and Daey helped me fill my plate and Claire’s. More than one family had brought fried chicken. I know that Claire loves chicken, so we put a chicken leg on her plate. I put some other things on there, and although all the food was to-die-for, from an adult’s perspective, I just wasn’t sure what she would eat. But, chicken she likes. We’ll start there.

So, we get back to the table, and I’m strapping her into the travel booster we brought. I turn my attention to my chair and sit down and turn to look at Claire. In the 7.8 seconds it took to do that, I watched her grab the drumstick and take a big ol’ chomp out of it. Normally, this wouldn’t be an issue, but 1) She’s never ever eaten chicken off the bone. I’m paranoid and tear off pieces for her. 2) She happened to take a big bite out of the very end of the leg, right at the end of the big fat part…you know, where that weird bone is!? She had that piece of bone in her mouth!

So, I tried not to panic, and I tried to get that piece out of her mouth without causing a scene. So much for that. She was NOT pleased and let me (and everyone else) hear it. I tried to explain that I wasn’t taking away the chicken! I was taking the hard boney part out of her mouth so she wouldn’t choke. As soon as I got it out, she continued chomping on the chicken leg.

When she was done, the bones on her plate looked like they’d been unearthed and carefully brushed off as part of an archaeological dig. (Grandpa would be so proud! Sorry…inside story.)

And, then she asked for another one.

That opened the floodgates, and she tried some other things and completely forgot about demanding milk. The water was just fine. So, apparently she was hungry. You solve that piece of the puzzle and the others fall into place.

After the meal, she warmed up some more and started playing with the other kids. She was still a lot more hesitant than she normally is, but at least she wasn’t clinging to my neck like a little monkey.

And, now I know. If I think she’s hungry, she is. And, she can tackle a drumstick like the best of them…as long as you get her started in the right spot. ;)

What did they sound like before there were freight trains?

It was around 10pm, on June 5th, and Claire had been in bed for an hour or so. My hubby and I were exhausted from spending another day playing with my nephews, and we had settled into the comfiness of our friends’ entertainment room.

The local weather had taken over the airwaves, and a fierce rain storm was howling outside, the sky alive with dramatic displays of lightening.

Things were getting rather heated outside, and the weather department was hopping. There had been tornadoes spotted, and every show was being interrupted with continuous updates.

When we moved in 1999, I was happy to leave the tornadoes behind. In our Mountain Time Zone home, tornadoes are rare. Yes, they have been known to appear in this state, but if they do, it’s usually out on the plains and not near the foothills that we call home.

This is not the case in my childhood home.

I’ve lived through a tornado, and it pretty much scarred me for life. That sounds so dramatic, and maybe I’ll forget that night….eventually…but I doubt it. It was the year before I went into Kindergarten (1978 for those of you playing along at home), and it’s all as clear as though it happened yesterday.

Anytime I see Tornado Watches and Tornado Warnings flash on the screen, I feel a tightening in my chest. I find it hard to breathe.

I am one of the few people I know who can describe to you, in great detail the difference between a Tornado Watch and a Tornado Warning. They are not the same. One means that conditions are right for one to appear, and the other means one has been spotted. They are both serious, but the warnings make me tense.

I grew up on a farm, miles and miles away from any type of warning system. Our chimney would whistle, and if that happened, it was time to go the basement. Now.

So, the weather guy is blabbering on and on about these storms, and I’m creating an escape plan in my head. Claire is in the pack-n-play. Her sandals are clasped on the handles of my bag.

Sandals? Why sandals? After the tornado in 1978, there was so much broken glass throughout our house that my parents sat me and my two year old sister on kitchen chairs with the instructions of not to move. My sister remembers that vividly. You can imagine the severity if someone who was just two years old at the time still remembers it.

Anyway, back to the plan. I could put my purse in that bag, grab her and the bags and get to the safe room in a matter of seconds. I could put her sandals on in there. We’re already on the basement level, so that’s one less step. How much time will we have?

I’m probably being silly.
We probably won’t need an escape plan.
Maybe they’ll miss us.

10:29pm Central Time
The tornado siren starts blaring.

Tornado!

My worst fears are coming true. My hubby and I bolt for the guest room, and I grab Claire and my bags and head to the room, as planned. Our friends join us with their two sleepy girls and their dog.

In my head, it was 30 years ago, and I was the scared 4-yr old huddled in the basement fruit cellar.

The shaking of foot-thick concrete walls.
The clanking of my mom’s canning jars.
So worried about our dog Susie, an outside dog.
Would she be okay? Where would she go?

There had been no warning, the weather radio crackling “partly cloudy skies.”
My dad had heard the chimney whistling and determined that something wasn’t right, and we’d fled to the basement.

His instincts were correct and saved our lives.

The electricity goes out and we’re left in the dank fruit cellar in the dark. I can smell the dirt on the potatoes. This room has always kinda scared me, and now it’s the only safe place in the house.

Glass breaking.

Then I hear that sound.
That deafening, horrible, powerful sound.
Raw fury.

From that day forward, I’ve always wondered what tornadoes sounded like before there were freight trains.

Years later, I sobbed through the movie Twister, my friends not sure I should see it in the theater. “I need to see it,” I told them. “I want to get rid of this fear.” It helped a little to cry. A little…but my fear is still here.

They got the sound in that movie dead on.

I will never forget it.

Susie was fine. Some of our neighbors weren’t. Their home was destroyed. Two of them lost their lives that day…a dad and his daughter. She was my age. My dad had been part of the National Guard, so he was one of the first people on the scene and helped with the bodies. I can’t even imagine. I get tears in my eyes just thinking about how hard that must have been for him. A little girl my age. A father like him. Not spared. The mother survived but spent her remaining years in a wheelchair.

Lives ripped apart in an instant.

Flash forward to now…

I’m the mother. I’m clutching my little girl as if her life depends on it, as if my life depends on it.

This room is too big. Something smaller would be safer. Right? Would it matter?

We haven’t lost power, so that’s good. Right? If the walls start shaking, where will I go? Where will I huddle with Claire? What’s on these huge shelves that could come crashing down on us if they give way. Nothing dangerous or heavy. I’m going under there. If the walls start shaking, I’m going under there. I don’t care if there are spiders.

We’re listening to the weather radio. They are taking calls from outside callers. Things are sounding pretty hairy out there. “And, now we go to Ed. Ed? You’re on the air. [dead silence] Well, folks, it seems as though we’ve lost Ed. Next caller…”

“Oh no!” I try to joke. “They’ve lost Ed! It must be serious!” I try to say with a laugh. Maybe levity will belie the fact that I’m crying inside. And that I can’t stop shaking.

Please let this be over soon. Let it hit so I can react, or let it pass so that I can breathe again.

Then…
The sirens stop.
The weather announcer gives the all-clear.

There was no shaking of walls or clanking of jars.
This time.
Here.

That storm system that chased us to the safe room traveled almost 60-miles north and east toward the farm where I grew up, and where we’d been the last two days. My sister and her husband heard the freight train around 1am and were able to get their four boys to the basement before the brunt of the storm hit.

A huge old tree having landed on the lilac bush, two uprooted apple trees, and a bent basketball hoop later, the storm had passed. The house and garage were still standing and didn’t sustain damage. The dog was covered in mud but happy to see everyone. The family members were safe.

You really can’t ask for more than that when you live in a Tornado Alley.

In the phone call that next morning with my sister, I asked her if we should reconfigure our trip and try to come up to help them clean up. She declined, saying she understood how hectic our trip already was. Plus, with four boys, they had a lot of helpers. So, we traveled on as planned, and they started the process of cleaning up the debris.

My little childhood state and other areas of the Midwest are taking a beating right now. If people aren’t being blown away by tornadoes, they’re being flooded out of their homes.

And, my heart goes out to all of them.