The following was sent to me via email from one of my friends. I literally started laughing so hard, out loud, that Claire kept saying, “What, Momma!? What!?” Ha!
(And, yes, I’m curious to see what kind of hits I get from Google Searchers over the next few days…) 
Enjoy!
HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM
1. Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of used men’s work boots, size 14 to 16.
2. Put them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo magazine.
3. Place a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine.
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:
Hey Bubba,
Big Jim, Duke, Slim, and I went for more ammunition. Back in an hour.
Don’t mess with the pit bulls – - they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don’t think Killer took part in it, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. I locked all four of ‘em in the house.
Better wait outside.
Cooter
sent to your Email
Hey, I live in Oklahoma. This is no joke in our part of the woods!
For every Cooter in my town, there are at least 10 pit bulls.
Oh my gosh, I loved this! Thanks for sharing
HA – thanks for posting this so now everyone has access to my “tip of the day”! Love, Cooter