Monthly Archive for September, 2009

Obstacles

All the way to my doctor’s appointment yesterday, I wondered if I’d missed a memo.

I was leaving straight from Claire’s preschool, which puts me a little closer to the highway.  (I got the earliest possible appointment, and should have enough time to make it.)  Normally, I avoid a certain highway going certain directions at certain times of day, and as I looked at my car clock-radio, I could hear my husband’s voice chiding me.

“I can’t believe you don’t take the highway. It’s so much faster, and more direct!” he says, albeit in my head.

“Unless you’re stuck in gridlock,” I counter. “Who cares if it’s a straight line if you’re not moving, or if you’re trying to avoid playing bumper-cars with the other crazies?”

“You’re just not used to driving in rush-hour traffic anymore,” he says. “It’s not like this is abnormal.”

“Exactly. I don’t drive in rush-hour anymore. Why should I if I don’t have to?” I ask.

Even though this was a conversation in my head, I decided to let him win. How bad could it be? It’s almost 9am…it should be fine. If it is truly faster (the jury is still out on that one), I need every extra minute I can get. I hate being rushed, but there was no way to avoid this. I was just glad they had an appointment that matched Claire’s preschool schedule.

I headed toward the highway.  As I was taking the entrance ramp, I saw the parking lot before me. It’s not even moving! Great.

Luckily enough, I’d decided to take this entrance ramp, because there’s an escape route of sorts onto a side street. So, I took it.

No highway for me today!

Since I was already over in this area, I decided to take the ninja route which parallels the highway, just to see how far down the clog was. The traffic was backed up as far as I could see.

So, I ended up cutting across town and took the way I would normally go. This is the way my husband hates to take. It’s a little farther to drive (maybe…again, this hasn’t been proven beyond a shadow of a doubt), but almost always has no delays. Of course, with all my course-corrections, I’m a little behind schedule.

As I’m getting to the street I need, I see a construction sign warning me that such-n-such road is closed up ahead and that alternate routes are advised. Could I remember the name of that street where I make my turn?

No. I don’t need to know the name…I know where it is. It doesn’t matter anyway, because it’s either the street I need or it isn’t. Any alternate routes would have to be on past the construction. I mean, if it was actually the street I needed, isn’t that sign in the wrong place? It’s too late to turn back if it’s the street they’re talking about.

Sure enough, the road I’m on is down to one-lane with a flagger.  The road I normally take is the one under construction and completely closed.

Sweet!

After waiting my turn, driving through the construction zone and making up an even more creative route, I arrived at the hospital with few minutes to spare. As I’m walking to the building, I notice that the entrance I normally use is barricaded.

What is going on!? Am I missing something??

A parking lot of a highway, a construction delay, a closed road, and a barricaded entrance. “We tried to stop her at every turn, but she just kept going,” I could hear the gods whispering amongst themselves.

I found another way to get to the office I needed and arrived before my appointment. Luckily, I’d filled all the “new patient” paperwork out at home, so I wasn’t rushed.

So, how did the appointment turn out? What’s the verdict on my knee?

The good news: I really like my doctor, and I’m really glad I got to meet him. I was able to get my flu shot while I was there, so there is no added co-payment or expense to do that.

The I-suppose-it’s-good-news: The way my knee feels is normal for the type of injury I have.

The I’m-really-trying-to-spin-this-in-a-positive-way-but-it’s-kinda-bad-news: I have a “severely bruised bone,” and it’s causing trouble where the tendons attach. There isn’t anything they can do for my knee. It could take 6-months for it to heal. There isn’t anything I can take for the pain. There isn’t anything I should have done differently. (Besides going back in time and not falling, which can’t be remedied now…) I just have to avoid doing things that make it hurt.

And, after avoiding so many obstacles on the way to the doctor’s office…what’s a few more?

Keep your jokes to yourself, Dr. Freud.

Yesterday, Claire and I had the chance to see a piece of Americana.  I got the message that this would be visiting a store parking lot near us, and I jumped at the chance to share it with my daughter.  She had no idea why I was so excited, but my enthusiasm was contagious.

The Wienermobile

The Wienermobile!

I may or may not have been just a little too excited to see the Wienermobile. Keep your jokes to yourself, Dr. Freud.

Think what you want about hot dogs and other such products, but this was really cool!

You

You're singing the song now...aren't you?

And, what would an experience like this be without sharing it with the world, real-time on Twitter and Facebook?!  Imagine my delight when I realized that The Wienermobile even sent me a Tweet!

Tweet from Wienermobile

The “glad we could ketchup” cracks me up!! 🙂

Oscar Mayer Wienermobile and Claire

Claire had a blast. (Those are stickers on her leg. No, she hasn’t been injured. She refused to take them off.)

More than one Oscar Mayer song has been stuck in my head ever since, and one of them is in Spanish.

Yes, my High School Spanish 4 Class recorded some commercials…wayyyy back in the late 1900s, and I was in the group that put together (and performed) the Spanish lyrics to “My Bologna Has A First Name.” It actually fits better than you might imagine.

The B.O.L.O.G.N.A. fits nicely with the Spanish “salchicha,” especially since the CH is one letter in Spanish. “Chay.” How convenient!

B.O.L.O.G.N.A. = S.A.L.Ch.I.Ch.A = 7 letters.

What are the odds?

Yes, technically salchicha is sausage. Close enough.

And, yes, because of that song, I’ve always spelled Oscar Mayer and bologna correctly. 😉

So, working from memory, here it is!

English version:
My bologna has a first name.
It’s O.S.C.A.R.
My bologna has a second name.
It’s M.A.Y.E.R.
I love to eat it every day
And if you ask me why, I’ll say
Because Oscar Mayer has a way with
B.O.L.O.G.N.A

Spanish version:
Mi salchicha tiene un nombre.
Es O.S.C.A.R (sung out in Spanish letters)
Mi salchicha tiene un apellido.
Es M.A.Y.E.R (sung in the Spanish alphabet, of course)
Me gusta comerlo cada día
Y si me preguntes por qué dice
Porque Oscar Mayer tiene una manera con
S.A.L.Ch.I.Ch.A

(That looks like lots to say, but with practice, you can sing it just as smoothly as the English version.  Trust me.)

Rumor has it that these commercials are still in existence on some VHS tapes. My High School Facebook friends will be happy to know that those secrets are safe with me, considering we don’t even have a VCR anymore. 😉

P.S.  Don’t you wish you were an Oscar Mayer wiener? 🙂

Get down on your knees…or not.

So, I broke down and made an appointment for my knee.

I think it’s officially been upgraded from “skinned knee fiasco” to more of a real “knee injury.”

As you may remember, I fell. I wasn’t doing anything exciting; I just fell.

That was three weeks ago.

Now, for the record, I tried to learn to be patient once, but it took way too long so I gave it up.  Maybe I’m not the best judge of how long something is supposed to take.  Still…three weeks seems a bit excessive, no?  It has physically healed on the outside.  The scab has come off.  It’s not infected (that I can tell).  But, I still can’t put any direct pressure on it.

Whenever I talk about my knee, it’s confusing and I need to whip out the whiteboard and draw diagrams.  If I say, “I can’t put any pressure on it,” that implies that I can’t walk on it.  That’s not true.  I can.  Going up and down stairs still hurts a little, but that’s not what I’m talking about.  I can’t get on my knees without there being excruciating pain.

This puts a crimp in a lot of what I do during the day.

(Insert horribly inappropriate jokes here…)  😉

I’m talking about buckling and unbuckling Claire’s car seat, helping Claire put away toys, and giving Claire a bath.

In fact, you’d be surprised at how much I use my knee.

So, it’s been three weeks.  That’s too long.  Tomorrow, I get to meet our new doctor and have him tell me that there’s nothing wrong with it.

I hope.

You know technology has taken over your life when…

  • You use your cell phone as a flashlight.
  • You check someone’s facebook or twitter status before emailing or txting them to see how their day is going.
  • You have the urge to write LOL or 🙂 in a business email.
  • You drive out of your way to get your cell phone that you left at home even though you never carried one with you for years.

You’re considered an old-timer techie when…

  • You got your first cell phone for self-protection not only to reach people in an emergency but because it was so big it could double as a weapon.


What about you?

Reverse Psychology is just another name for Trickery, and I’m okay with that.

“Claire…” I say, looking at the clock. “Do you know what time it is?”

“No……..” she says slyly. She knows what time it is.

“Claire, it’s time for you to go mow the yard!”

“No, it’s not!” she screams, bursting into laughter.

“It’s time for you to go wash the car?”

“No, it’s not!” she screeches again.

“I know! It’s time for you to do all the laundry!”

“No!” she says again with a smile. “It’s time for me to go to bed!”

“It is?” I say with mock incredulity. “What? Are you sure?”

“Yes! It’s time for me to go to bed!”

“Well, that’s a great idea, Claire!”

It’s hard to resist a suggestion you came up with all on your own, wouldn’t you say? 😉

Was it sponsored by the Letter T?

I had the opportunity to attend the 40th Anniversary Celebration for Celestial Seasonings! I’m writing about that today at Mile High Mamas.

Go check it out!

JoAnn interviewing Charlie Baden

Not Your Typical Tea Party

The comments are closed here, but I’d love to hear from you over there!

So, what was it?

I am impressed with all the guesses!  Thanks for playing along!!

Here’s the answer:

Iris

Okay, not really. But…Well, kinda.

Here’s the full version of the original photo:

Full version of what is this

Making the Iris Leaf Skirt

Daddy and Claire made a skirt out of the iris leaves! This was Daddy’s idea, and I was very impressed! (He and Claire did some yardwork on Saturday, while I was an an all-day workshop, and cleaning up the iris beds was one of their projects.)  Daddy came up with the idea of using the iris leaves as a skirt for Claire, all on his own!  I helped pick out the needle and string, but he and Claire did all the rest!

Iris Leaf Skirt

Here is the photo of it before it dries. It’s drying right now, so we’ll be sure to take a photo of the final, final project.

And, no, this wasn’t even part of a Halloween costume…unless you can convince Claire that Sleeping Beauty wore a grass skirt made of iris leaves. 😉

What’s your guess?

Today, we’re doing something a little different.  I’m going to show you a picture, and I want to see if you can guess what it is!

What is this

What do you think this is?  Please leave your guess in the comments!

Does it smell orange in here to you?

Clown Nose Claire

“Momma Clown?”

“Yes, Baby Clown?”

“Momma Clown, I can’t breathe!”

“Well, breathe through your mouth, Baby Clown.”

“Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh!”

This is the Clown Nose Claire got from the Behind the Scenes Adventure with the Cirque du Soleil Kooza Crew. Oh, and…I never know who/what she’s pretending to be until she calls me the Momma version of it…luckily that almost always happens at the beginning of the skit. 🙂

The New Sea Monsters IMAX opens September 18th at the DMNS

A couple weeks ago, the three of us were invited to a special sneak preview of the newest IMAX adventure at the Denver Museum of Nature & Science.

Sea Monsters IMAX at DMNS

Sea Monsters
A Prehistoric Adventure

Along with the invitation was the warning: “this film merits a PG rating for some intense wildlife images, including scenes of simulated predation.”

So, of course, we decided to take Claire, our three year old, with us.

It’s so hard to tell what is going to upset her and what isn’t.

She watches all kinds of “nature” programs with us, and they always have the sharp edge of “predation.” I mean, everybody’s gotta eat. Right? Some scenes are a little harsher, and I do try to shield her from those.

The dragon scene in “Sleeping Beauty” where Prince Phillip kills Maleficent? She hardly blinks an eye.

The entire “Finding Nemo” movie? Traumatic experience. She cried through the whole thing!   (More than once, because she begged to watch it again!)  Every two seconds she was asking me if they were ever going to be reunited. My guess? The name of the movie says it all. It’s not called “They Lose Nemo Forever and Ever.  The End.”  (And, for the record, I skip the entire first scene with the mother because that almost makes me cry.)

*sigh*

Sea Monsters of the deep? Who knows? They could be like dragons, which though worrisome, are not a deal-breaker. Or, it could be too much like Nemo, and all hope would be abandoned at the door.

Time would tell.

The evening started out well enough. We got to hear from Kenneth Carpenter, PhD, Curator of Paleontology at the Denver Museum of Nature & Science. He “heads the fossil preparation laboratory at the Museum and is a world-renowned dinosaur expert.” He gave us “the inside story on development of this film, which brings to life the extraordinary marine reptiles of the dinosaur age.”

That part was really cool, actually:  seeing what goes into making such a masterpiece.

DMNS Sea Monsters IMAX

After he spoke, which wasn’t scary at all actually, the movie started. It was one of the best IMAX movies my husband and I have ever seen. We loved it.

…And it scared poor little Claire half to death.

There were parts of the movie that were scary for me…but I’m old enough to handle it. I actually enjoyed being frightened by the sea monsters leaping out of the prehistoric oceans and into my lap.

Claire, on the other hand, buried her head in my neck for the scary parts and then asked me unending questions about the storyline during the calmer parts. I won’t give anything away, but the movie follows the lives of a little Dolichorhynchops (Dolly for short) family, and not unlike most children’s movies, *cough* Disney *cough* some members of the family may or may not make it to the end of the movie.

The emotional connection in most movies is really strong for Claire, even though she’s only 3, so that was disturbing for her, not to mention the larger-than-life monsters jumping out of the screen. As with anything, kids of all ages may or may not be able to handle such excitement. You be the judge.

Claire didn’t cry, but it wasn’t the best experience for her.  Your child may totally dig it.  Like I said, my husband and I loved it!

So, if you like IMAX movies, you should check this out.   It opens tomorrow!  (September 18, 2009) Click here for showtimes and prices.

Photos provided by Denver Museum of Nature & Science.